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Full Version: Humour (possibly NSFW)
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Post yer funny stuff here!
[Image: Image%202012-08-16%20at%209.53.33%20PM.png]
Now that's humorous, Mic.
(16-Aug-2012 12:34)Tetrode wrote: [ -> ]Now that's humorous, Mic.
A win first up! Woo! Icon_lol

I'm not sure it'd be too well received over at POTN2, though Icon_smile
LOL.... that's pretty awesome.

I'm guessing Martin might have a joke or two that he could post. Icon_smile
(16-Aug-2012 14:29)Sheldon N wrote: [ -> ]I'm guessing Martin might have a joke or two that he could post. Icon_smile
Maybe Icon_smile

Actually, that's made me think - maybe I shouldn't post "non-family-friendly" stuff like that out here.
(16-Aug-2012 14:38)juice wrote: [ -> ]
(16-Aug-2012 14:29)Sheldon N wrote: [ -> ]I'm guessing Martin might have a joke or two that he could post. Icon_smile
Maybe Icon_smile

Actually, that's made me think - maybe I shouldn't post "non-family-friendly" stuff like that out here.

Easy fix! Instead of calling it "Humour (possibly)", call it "Humour (possibly non-family-friendly!)".
No worries on my end. As long as there aren't unexpected naked people then it's fine with me. I just don't want to scroll across/open a thread that doesn't have a NSFW warning.
(16-Aug-2012 12:45)juice wrote: [ -> ]
(16-Aug-2012 12:34)Tetrode wrote: [ -> ]Now that's humorous, Mic.
A win first up! Woo! Icon_lol

I'm not sure it'd be too well received over at POTN2, though Icon_smile

Go ahead post it up on P2 Icon_smile
(16-Aug-2012 14:38)juice wrote: [ -> ]
(16-Aug-2012 14:29)Sheldon N wrote: [ -> ]I'm guessing Martin might have a joke or two that he could post. Icon_smile
Maybe Icon_smile

Actually, that's made me think - maybe I shouldn't post "non-family-friendly" stuff like that out here.

Hey, what are you saying about my jokes Icon_sad
(16-Aug-2012 15:23)FJ Love wrote: [ -> ]
(16-Aug-2012 14:38)juice wrote: [ -> ]
(16-Aug-2012 14:29)Sheldon N wrote: [ -> ]I'm guessing Martin might have a joke or two that he could post. :)
Maybe :)

Actually, that's made me think - maybe I shouldn't post "non-family-friendly" stuff like that out here.

Hey, what are you saying about my jokes :(

Most are crap :icon_lol:
(16-Aug-2012 16:30)Sigma Pi wrote: [ -> ]
(16-Aug-2012 15:23)FJ Love wrote: [ -> ]
(16-Aug-2012 14:38)juice wrote: [ -> ]
(16-Aug-2012 14:29)Sheldon N wrote: [ -> ]I'm guessing Martin might have a joke or two that he could post. Icon_smile
Maybe Icon_smile

Actually, that's made me think - maybe I shouldn't post "non-family-friendly" stuff like that out here.

Hey, what are you saying about my jokes Icon_sad

Most are crap Icon_lol

That's not what you say when you call me
(16-Aug-2012 15:20)Sheldon N wrote: [ -> ]No worries on my end. As long as there aren't unexpected naked people then it's fine with me. I just don't want to scroll across/open a thread that doesn't have a NSFW warning.
OK, cool.

(16-Aug-2012 15:22)FJ Love wrote: [ -> ]Go ahead post it up on P2 Icon_smile
Yes, it would be well received Icon_smile

(16-Aug-2012 16:32)FJ Love wrote: [ -> ]That's not what you say when you call me
He's like that!
(16-Aug-2012 16:32)FJ Love wrote: [ -> ]
(16-Aug-2012 16:30)Sigma Pi wrote: [ -> ]
(16-Aug-2012 15:23)FJ Love wrote: [ -> ]
(16-Aug-2012 14:38)juice wrote: [ -> ]
(16-Aug-2012 14:29)Sheldon N wrote: [ -> ]I'm guessing Martin might have a joke or two that he could post. Icon_smile
Maybe Icon_smile

Actually, that's made me think - maybe I shouldn't post "non-family-friendly" stuff like that out here.

Hey, what are you saying about my jokes Icon_sad

Most are crap Icon_lol

That's not what you say when you call me
True I did not want to cuss

"These are fucking awful!"
[Image: 0c006e9604d887fab80e9bef6463e19b.jpg]
That's the point of camouflage, innit?
(17-Aug-2012 05:33)juice wrote: [ -> ]That's the point of camouflage, innit?

OK fine one for you


[Image: db510704e6c92f885a738bf48d3b81fd.jpg]
Nice one Icon_smile
(16-Aug-2012 14:42)Tetrode wrote: [ -> ]Easy fix! Instead of calling it "Humour (possibly)", call it "Humour (possibly non-family-friendly!)".
I meant to nominate this for the "helpdesk" award Icon_smile
(17-Aug-2012 09:24)juice wrote: [ -> ]
(16-Aug-2012 14:42)Tetrode wrote: [ -> ]Easy fix! Instead of calling it "Humour (possibly)", call it "Humour (possibly non-family-friendly!)".
I meant to nominate this for the "helpdesk" award Icon_smile

Yes, that was definitely a helpdesk-quality suggestion but a very effective CYA solution nonetheless.
(17-Aug-2012 12:15)Tetrode wrote: [ -> ]Yes, that was definitely a helpdesk-quality suggestion but a very effective CYA solution nonetheless.
Both points are true Icon_smile
ACTUAL AUSTRALIAN COURT DOCKET 12659 ---

A lady about 8 months pregnant got on a bus.

She noticed the man opposite her was smiling at her.

She immediately moved to another seat.

This time the smile turned into a grin, so she moved again.

The man seemed more amused.

When on the fourth move, the man burst out laughing,

She complained to the driver and he had the man arrested.


The case came up in court.


The judge asked the man (about 20 years old)

What he had to say for himself.

The man replied,

'Well your Honor, it was like this:

When the lady got on the bus,

I couldn't help but notice her condition.

She sat down under a sign that said,

'The Double Mint Twins are coming' and I grinned..

Then she moved and sat under a sign that said,

'Logan's Liniment will reduce the swelling,' and I had to smile.

Then she placed herself under a deodorant sign that said,

'William's Big Stick Did the Trick,' and I could hardly contain myself.

But, Your Honor, when she moved the fourth time

And sat under a sign that said,

'Goodyear Rubber could have prevented this Accident!'

... I just lost it.'


'CASE DISMISSED!!'
Two little kids are in a hospital, lying on stretchers next to each other outside the operating room, the first surgeries of the day.

The first kid leans over and asks, "What are you in here for?"

The second kid says, "I'm getting my tonsils out, and I'm afraid."

The first kid says, "You've got nothing to worry about. I had that done when I was four. They put you to sleep, and when you wake up they give you lots of Jell-O and ice cream. It's a breeze."

The second kid then asks, "What are you here for?"

The first kid says, "Circumcision."

"Whoa!" the second kid replies, "Good luck, buddy. I had that done when I was born, Couldn't walk for a year."
Peter was sunbathing naked at the beach in Jamaica .
For the sake of civility, and to keep it from getting sunburned, he had a hat over his private parts.
A woman walks past and says, snickering,
"If you were a gentleman you'd lift your hat."

He raised an eyebrow and replied, "If you were better looking it would lift itself."
HEY! I thought this was supposed to be a family friendly forum.

I told those jokes to my kids and they didn't find them funny at all.
(18-Aug-2012 20:46)Sheldon N wrote: [ -> ]HEY! I thought this was supposed to be a family friendly forum.

I told those jokes to my kids and they didn't find them funny at all.

they have no sense of humor just like Pi Icon_biggrin
LOL Icon_biggrin
(18-Aug-2012 20:46)Sheldon N wrote: [ -> ]I told those jokes to my kids and they didn't find them funny at all.
(18-Aug-2012 20:52)FJ Love wrote: [ -> ]they have no sense of humor just like Pi Icon_biggrin
Icon_mrgreen
Yeah, I know you've already seen it. Still funny, though Icon_smile


Where's the like button????
How cool is this?
[Image: i-rMmLB4T-X2.jpg]
(22-Aug-2012 08:13)Blackshadow wrote: [ -> ]Where's the like button????
Good question. Haven't found a good one. This forum software has a reputation thingo, but I've disabled it.

(22-Aug-2012 08:19)Blackshadow wrote: [ -> ]How cool is this?
Saw that the other day, LOL Icon_smile If it wasn't impractically small, I'd have chased one down.
(22-Aug-2012 08:19)Blackshadow wrote: [ -> ]How cool is this?
quote:Saw that the other day, LOL Icon_smile If it wasn't impractically small, I'd have chased one down.
Didn't stop you with the Strobella Icon_smile

Austen.
(23-Aug-2012 05:21)Austen wrote: [ -> ]Didn't stop you with the Strobella Icon_smile
Last I saw of that, it was on its way to India.
My boss stormed up to me in the office today and said, "You missed work yesterday, didn't you?"

"Not particularly," I replied.
(23-Aug-2012 05:31)alGARDNER wrote: [ -> ]My boss stormed up to me in the office today and said, "You missed work yesterday, didn't you?"

"Not particularly," I replied.
Droll Icon_smile

But shouldn't your boss KNOW?
(23-Aug-2012 05:51)juice wrote: [ -> ]Droll Icon_smile

But shouldn't your boss KNOW?

No, he wasn't here either. :P
(23-Aug-2012 06:21)alGARDNER wrote: [ -> ]No, he wasn't here either. :P
Less storming, then! Bosses Icon_smile
(23-Aug-2012 06:31)juice wrote: [ -> ]Less storming, then! Bosses Icon_smile

Pffft.
TWENTY DOLLARS


On their wedding night, the young bride
Approached her new husband and asked
For $20.00 for their first lovemaking
Encounter. In his highly aroused state,
Her husband readily agreed.
This scenario was repeated each time they made
Love, for more than 40 years, with him thinking that it was a
Cute way for her to afford new clothes and other incidentals that
She needed.
Arriving home around noon one day, she was
Surprised to find her husband in a very drunken state.
During the next few minutes, he explained that
His employer was going through a process of corporate
Downsizing, and he had been let go.


It was unlikely that, at the age of 59, he'd be able to find
Another position that paid anywhere near what
He'd been earning, and therefore, they were financially ruined.


Calmly, his wife handed him a bank book which
Showed more than forty years of steady deposits and interest totaling
Nearly $1 million. Then she showed him certificates of deposits issued
By the bank which were worth over $2 million,
And informed him that they
Were one of the largest depositors in the bank.


She explained that for more than
Three decades she had 'charged' him for sex,
These holdings had multiplied and these were the
Results of her savings and investments.

Faced with evidence of cash and investments
Worth over $3 million, her husband was so astounded he could
Barely speak, but finally he found his voice and blurted out,
'If I'd had any idea what you were doing,
I would have given you all my business!'


That's when she shot him.
LOL. Icon_smile
Oh, Martin Icon_smile
Golf clap! Icon_smile
(24-Aug-2012 04:32)alGARDNER wrote: [ -> ]Golf clap! Icon_smile
This from a bloke who sleeps with his dog Icon_smile
It's things like this that make me love the interwebz

http://modelswhojustfarted.tumblr.com
[Image: Image%202012-08-24%20at%2011.35.07%20PM.png]
[Image: Image%202012-08-30%20at%207.37.30%20PM.png]
For Martain.

[Image: Image%202012-09-01%20at%207.10.32%20PM.png]
(01-Sep-2012 09:11)juice wrote: [ -> ]For Martain.

[Image: Image%202012-09-01%20at%207.10.32%20PM.png]

Very good Mic, now I know how you feel when Pi posts kangaroos Icon_smile
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